Thursday, December 22

dear boys: a link up

(Okay so this is a blog link-up thing where you write a letter to...boys?!?! I'm going to try this anyway, even if I'm late to the party)

Dear teenage boys,

Sorry, the majority of you don't give me hope for the future of our country.  Please realize you actually aren't the funniest things in the universe...I'm funnier, but my humor is way to subtle for you to understand. O.o
And attempt to behave like you're human. I wouldn't trust any of you to fly a helicopter.
an observer of human nature

Dear buff-muscles-guys-on-TV,
You don't impress me the way you obviously think you do. I think you are absolutely gross.

Dear boys,
Video game expertise does not make girls attracted to you. 
a call-of-duty hater

Dear pretty-boy-movie-star-who-thinks-he's-"hot",
Not impressed. Narcissism drips from the television screen.
an irritated film critic

Dear little brother,
I think you're pretty cool. Just stop getting mad at me please, and never ever grow taller than me. :-)
Have a wonderful birthday on Saturday!
love you,
your weird, annoying nerd of a sister

Dear Dad,
you are the kindest, most courteous, handy and smart man ever. I hope I can grow up to be just like you.
your daughter

Dear future husband,
You better be pretty darn wonderful or I'm not marrying you. Having said that, please lose your temper permanently, and fill your iPod with classical music as well, or you risk losing a wonderful, fabulous, attractive, musical, classy, artistic, dramatic, unromantic and extremely eccentric wife. Oh and BTW, I want five children.
With love,
 Isn't this an exotic looking wedding cake? cool!

Dear George Lucas,
Kill Jar Jar Binks off, cancel The Clone Wars, and release A New Hope in 3D asap. Then I will think more highly of you.
the Star wars encyclopedia and criticizer extraordinaire

Dear pierced, dyed, and mohawked young man,
You look like a pseudo-barbaric freak. Yes, I'm being judgmental.
random person

Dearest iPod touch,
I'm afraid this relationship cannot continue. I spend all my time with you, instead of in the non-cyber world where I belong. 
My heart is breeaaakkkinnnng. *sobs melodramatically*
Yours forever,
an overly imaginative Apple fan

Dear Rhode Island Red Rooster,
Quit spurring me or you're stew.
Not kidding,
your owner

Dear Edward Cullen and Jacob Black,
I abhor you: you're both freakish anomalies of modern teen fiction. Go jump of a cliff. A tall one. NOW.
someone who hates young adult books

Dear Nathan,
You are the most adorable thing ever!

Dear reader,
I hope you enjoy my blog! Please click 'follow', or I'll have to use my Uzi on your head.
Just kidding--maybe.
Me myself :-)



  1. Dear teenage boys,
    wait, when did sweat-drenched and bad smells become attractive?
    Must have missed the memo.


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